Psychological Principles: Modes of Thinking
From Learn to be a true Social Engineer
“Simply confirming your nonverbal behavior to the client, using language from the client’s preferred representational system and matching speech volume, tone and area of speech often overcomes client reluctance to communicate”. -“Subtle Skills for Building Rapport”[1]
Contents |
The Senses
The world is brought to our brain by our senses. We interpret those senses to give us our perception of reality. In the traditional classification there are five senses:
- Sight
- Hearing
- Touch
- Smell
- Taste
This classification was attributed to Aristotle. As time has passed, an additional five senses have been added:
- Equilibrioception (balance)
- Nociception (pain)
- Kinesthesia & Proprioception (acceleration and joint motion)
- Sense of Time
- Thermoception (temperature differences).
Imagine you touch a hot pipe while standing on a ladder. As the pain from the temperature difference between your hand and the hot pipe makes you fall off the ladder (balance then acceleration / joint motion) time seems to speed up or slow down before you hit the ground. While most beginners focus on the dominant senses, additional benefits can be obtained by noting and utilizing the additional five senses.[2]
Dominant Sense
Of all the senses only three tend to make it back out in our speech: Sight, Hearing and Kinesthesia. We see it, we hear it or we can touch it. People tend to have one sense stronger for some reason. Differences have been noted between sexes.
The different senses actual can be heard in conservations with people. When you listen to people you can easily pickup their dominant sense. Normally, seeing (visual), hearing (auditory) and touching (kinesthetic) are the senses that are strongest and show up the most in conversation. "Do you SEE what I’m saying?", "Can you HEAR what I’m saying?", or "Can you FEEL my words?". Most people tend to be multi-sensed but one theme predominates. Research is currently underway concerning how long we stay in each dominant mode.
Here is one method we can practice to learn how to pick up someone's dominant sense. Listen to a conversation. That's it, just listen. Determine what dominant sense the conversers are. How long does the dominant sense last? Do the speakers have multiple senses in their conversation? This exercise helps you develop the objective assessment skills needed to be an NLP practitioner.
Submodalaties
Each sense has a range that it works within. Is it too loud or too soft? Too bright or too dark? Too hot or too cold? These ranges are decided by each individual but common agreements can be found, usually self protection driven. Yes, staring at the sun is too bright, jet engines are too loud and minus 30 degrees is too cold! These are strong tools for anyone using NLP so understanding not just the dominant sense, but the parts that make up that sense are key.
Ivan Pavlov known for ringing a bell – feed the dog experiment. In the end the dog would hear the sound of the bell, then salivate. What most don’t know is he was more interested in the physical and emotional aspects of submodalities. The interesting point is that the louder the bell rang the more the dog salivated. The range change of the submodality produced a direct physical change.
Time submodality has great use in therapy and marketing. Projecting the subject into a “better place” where there problem is solved is hallmark in both fields. Projecting yourself to that “happy place” which is in a different time is a common joke. “Remember those happy days of summer?”
How can you find your submodalities? Try this:
- Clear your body by walking around shaking yourself. Rest a few minutes then start the next section.
- Think of a situation where you feel confident. Something you know you have mastered.
- What is the range of your submodalities? Tone? Color? Movement? Warm? What is your body feeling? These are submodalities for feeling masterful.
- Note these feelings and write them down.
- Clear your body by walking around shaking yourself. Rest a few minutes then start the next section.
- Picture a fearful situation. Something that you must do but are very doubtful about the outcome. Cold? Tight? Size? Distance? Feel and understand these submodalities associated with doubt.
- Compare the different submodalities. Can you replace the fear feeling with mastery feelings?
Dominant Senses
Visual
Most men tend to be visual dominant. Women tend to be sense balanced or auditory. This shows up in how they watch TV. Men usually go from channel to channel, looking for interesting visual inputs while women actually stay on one program for a few minutes and listen to the dialogue. They have clubs where men go and “watch” semi clothed women dance around, again a visual stimulus.
Phrases
- “I see what you mean.”
- “That looks good to me.”
- “I get the picture now.”
Submodalities
- Light (bright / dim)
- Size (large / small)
- Color (black & white / color)
- Movement (fast / slow)
- Focus (clear / hazy)
- Location
Auditory
Women are usually auditory. Daytime talk show hosts know this and keep lively conversations going to attract female viewers (think The View or Oprah).
Phrases
- “Loud and clear”
- “Something tells me...”
- “That sounds OK to me.”
Submodalities
- Volume (loud / soft)
- Tone (base / treble)
- Pitch (high / low)
- Temp (fast / slow)
- Distance (near / far)
Kinesthetic
Kinesthetic relates to tactile, visceral and sense of self sensations of the body. Basically, where our body is in space and the self awareness of the body.
Phrases
- “I can grasp that idea.”
- "How does that grab you?”
- “I’ll get in touch with you.”
Submodalities
- Intensity (strong / weak)
- Area (large / small)
- Texture (rough / smooth)
- Temperature (hot / cold)
- Weight (heavy / light)
Designing For The Sexes
Ads designed for men and women are different, based on the different dominant sense. Ads designed for women tend to have more words, while men’s ads have more pictures. Women usually are more balanced in sense with auditory and olfactory (smell) being slightly stronger. Studies[3] show women who are ovulating (ready to conceive) usually pick the same men based on the man’s smell.
References
- ↑ http://www.social-engineer.org/wiki/archives/ModesOfThinking/MOT_FBI_3of5.htm
- ↑ http://nlpuniversitypress.com/
- ↑ http://www.social-engineer.org/wiki/archives/ModesOfThinking/MOT_SmellAttractive.html
